I hate PzIVs

[Steiner14]

Weasel,
you state things (spotting must be reciprocal) and when the game does not follow your assumtions, you call it stupid.
Do you play CMx1 with such a negative mindset, too? Definately not. Especially in CMx1 the player has to imagine many things, if something strange happens, to explain it. That CMx1 is more abstracted probably makes it easier.

I'd suggest you approach CMx2 with the same positive attitude you approach CMx1 and try to imagine a circumstance, that delivers the spotting result you are seeing.
I have presented you one possible explanation. I am sure you can find several others - if you try.
But if you reject everything, but on the other hand can easily accept all the shortcomings in CMx1, then the problem is less game mechanics related, but more a question of the different attitudes you approach the different games.