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I was testing the children in my local Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to Heaven.

I asked them, 'If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church,

would that get me into Heaven?'

'NO!' the children answered.

'If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?'

Again, the answer was, 'NO!' By now I was starting to smile.

Hey, this was fun! 'Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweets to all the children,

and loved my wife would that get me into Heaven?' I asked them again.

Again, they all answered, 'NO!' I was just bursting with pride for them.

Well, I continued, 'then how can I get into Heaven?'

A six-year-old boy from Glasgow shouted out,


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“YOU'VE GOT TAE BE F*C*IN' DEAD”



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